for release September 14, 2001
The Sandwich Generation . . . Helping Your Aging Parents
by Carol Abaya, M.A.
Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children, yourself and working at the same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your once vibrant parent is now frail and needy?
Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation is dedicated to the 50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns and/or responsibilities.
ORGAN DONORS WISHES MUST BE MET
2nd of 2 Articles
Question: I am still young (60s) and want to donate (to someone who can have continued life) any of my organs that are still viable. If I have one of the key chronic illnesses, like Alzheimer's or Parkinson's, I'd like my entire body given to medical research. My parents and my children are appalled. They say they will never allow this. How can I be sure my wishes are honored?
Answer: Congratulations on your generosity. There are almost 80,000 people on official registries waiting for an organ transplant. Maybe 25% will get that badly needed organ, and at least 6,000 die annually.
As I said in last week's article, there is a national organ donor registry, Living Bank. Telephone number is 1-800-528-2971. Ask for the President, Jon Eiche.
Signing an official organ donor form, which would be witnessed and notarized, will provide some assurance. The legal weight depends on the state in which you live. The trend legally and public policy-wise continues to lean to a patient's/individual's right to determine his/her own end of life and even the thereafter.
Under previous laws, a person's body became the property of the family. This right is now limited in most states by the uniform anatomical gift act. The exact wording varies, but generally it states that the wishes of the deceased MUST be honored.
In states with the strongest law, any or all of the following may be applicable.
· Hospitals have the burden to find out a patient's wishes and must comply. In some states, hospitals can be fined if they fail to follow through.
· Permission from children or other family member(s) is not needed for the hospital to abide by the patient's wishes.
· Children cannot sue to stop the hospital from taking the designated organ(s).
· The gift (organ donation) cannot be revoked by a family member.
In reference to donating your entire body to research, arrangements should be made ahead of time with your chosen research institution. Many university medical schools and hospitals have a strong research component.
Years ago, the mother of a friend of mine donated the father's body to Rutgers University Medical School. The father had Parkinson's. The family felt others with Parkinson's might be helped in the future. After 18 months, the ashes were returned to the family.
There is another organization that organ donors can contact. The Association for Organ Procurement Organizations for a list of agencies near you. The member donor organizations handle the actual recovery and transportation of the organ. Their web site is www.AOPO.org. Or you can e-mail them at organdonation@AOPO.org.
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Question: My brother, 87, is in the hospital. The doctors refuse to answer my questions, and will only talk to my sister-in-law. Don't I have any rights?
Answer: Unless you are named in a Living Will, the doctors, legally do not have to talk with you. Your brother can tell them to answer your questions.
Personally, I think doctors should answer questions from close family members, and listen to what they have to say. New insight about a patient's condition could improve care or even save a life.
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Do you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered individually, appropriate letters will be answered in this column whenever possible. Letters may be edited. Send letters to Ms. Carol Abaya, c/o Name\Address of YOUR newspaper (or mail direct to her at PO Box 132,Wickatunk, NJ 07765-0132) or e-mail her at SandwchGen@aol.com.
Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator of the unique magazine The Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.
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