Globe Syndicate
for release June 7, 2002
The Sandwich Generation . . . Helping Your Aging Parents
by Carol Abaya, M.A.
Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children, yourself
and working at the same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your
once vibrant parent is now frail and needy?
Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation is
dedicated to the 50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns
and/or responsibilities.
NUTRITION KEY TO HEALTH AND HAPPINESS
Question: My mother, 74, has lost a lot of weight since my father died. She says
she doesn't like to cook just for herself. Also, she doesn't drive and so has
difficulty shopping on a regular basis. I don't live near her and so can't be
there on a frequent or daily basis.
Question: My mother, 83, is bedridden and my father, 82, can no longer drive and
has difficulty with meals. I used to do a lot of the cooking, but now have to
work part-time. I don't know what to do.
Answer: You're both right to be concerned as proper nutrition is a key
contributor to better health.
There are many marvelous Meals on Wheels programs, especially for the homebound.
Not only do they provide nutritious food, but also are a daily contact with
someone else.
Volunteers, who deliver the food, often get to know the elders, talk with them
on a daily basis, and can spot problems. Problem spotting has saved many elders'
lives as family members who live far away are alerted.
In deciding whether a Meals on Wheels [MW] program is right for your parent, ask
a lot of questions.
* Do volunteers (rather than a paid courier) deliver the food? Volunteers are
better.
* Do they bring the food inside the home, e.g. into the kitchen? Or just leave
it at the door?
* Does the MW program have a social worker who does a needs assessment? Other
problems may be identified.
* How many meals are delivered each day? Most have only one; but some bring both
a hot and a cold meal.
* How are the volunteers trained?
* Is there a crisis alert procedure?
The programs that use volunteers usually train and screen them. Ask if they do.
If yes, you shouldn't be afraid to have them go into your parent's home. (Of
course don't leave large sums of cash or jewelry around).
Aside from the nutrition aspect, daily contact with others is important in the
socialization needs process and can help reduce depression of those isolated.
Other ways to make sure a parent gets proper nutrition.
* Package precooked food in single serving packets and freeze. They can easily
be microwaved.
* Have a restaurant - or several - deliver meals on a regular basis.
* Hire someone - even a high school or college student - to handle shopping, and
even help with cooking.
* * *
Question. My mother, 82, has limited income, but insists on going to a senior
center several times a week for lunch. The van charges $5 a day. Why can't she
eat at home? It's cheaper.
Answer: Good for your mother. Socialization and nutritious meals extend
lifespan. Your mother gets both at the center. $5 a day is a lot cheaper than
medical bills. And certainly it is worthwhile for your mother to be happier than
sitting home alone.
* * *
Do you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered
individually, appropriate letters will be answered in this column whenever
possible. Letters may be edited. Send letters to Ms. Carol Abaya, c/o
Name\Address of YOUR newspaper (or mail direct to her at PO Box 132,Wickatunk,
NJ 07765-0132) or contact her through her web site: thesandwichgeneration.com.
Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator of the
unique magazine The Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.
NOTES TO EDITORS: text = 495 words; other material = 160 words
We would appreciate it if you would include the "Globe Syndicate" bug at the end
of the column.
©2002 by Globe Syndicate, all rights reserved.
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