Globe Syndicate

For release Friday July 16, 2004

The Sandwich Generation . . . Helping Your Aging Parents

by Carol Abaya, M.A.

ELDERS PUT SELF AT RISK

2nd of 2 Parts

Questions about how seniors can protect themselves have increased. Most come from seniors who, like the woman in last week’s column, are healthy, active and able to take care of themselves and their finances.

A few weeks ago, I gave my financial workshop, “Protecting Your $$: What NOT to Do,” to a group of seniors (55 to 90 in age). I was dismayed by the number of people who did not have a POA, the basic legal document to protect yourself.

Last week I said a POA should be viewed as a “helper” document. The following are two true stories about what can (and does) happen if there is no POA.

Scenario: An 80-year-old woman, named Anna, lived alone in an apartment. She was mentally alert and able to handle most every day chores and her financial affairs. On the way home from grocery shopping, Anna slipped off the curb, breaking her writing arm and wrist. She was in a cast (from elbow to fingers) for at least six weeks. She received home and personal care help through visiting nurses services. Her daughter lived 50 miles away.

However, in the beginning of the month Anna’s rent was due, and the telephone and electric bills came in. Her social security check came in. But she could not write out checks to pay the bills because her hand was in a cast. So the bills were not paid. Four weeks later, her hand was still in the cast. Again, Anna’s rent, telephone and electric bills needed to be paid. Again, they were not paid because no one else could write checks for her.

Repercussions: Anna received a threatening letter from the absentee landlord, who said “pay up or move out.” Letters from the telephone and electric companies said service would be cut if she didn’t pay her bills. In addition, Anna had no way to get money from her bank account to pay for groceries and other expenses.

Scenario: A 65-year-old working man, Fred, lived alone in his own home. As he transferred groceries from the shopping cart to this car, he lost he balance and fell. Fred broke three fingers and fractured his wrist. He was in a cast for two months because his hand did not initially heal properly. His son lived 125 miles away.

It was the beginning of the month. Fred’s house mortgage and car payments were due. Telephone, electric and gas, and car insurance bills came in. The next month came, and all the bills had to be paid again. But Fred could not write checks because of the cast, and no one else could write checks for him.

Repercussions: Fred faced late charges for not paying his mortgage on time. He received threatening letters from the telephone and electric companies, saying service would be cut off. The car insurance lapsed, and he could not access his money to pay for groceries or medical bills.

These are two everyday stories. Do you want to be in the same situation?

Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children, yourself and working at the same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your once vibrant parent is now frail and needy?

Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation is dedicated to the 50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns and/or responsibilities.

* * *

Do you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered individually, appropriate letters will be answered in this column whenever possible. Letters may be edited. Send letters to Ms. Carol Abaya, mail direct to her at PO Box 132, Wickatunk, NJ 07765-0132 or contact her through her web site: thesandwichgeneration.com.

Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator of the unique magazine The Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.

NOTES TO EDITORS: text = 565 words; other material = 160 words

We would appreciate it if you would include the "Globe Syndicate" bug at the end of the column.