Globe Syndicate
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release
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by Carol Abaya, M.A.
VACATIONS ARE FOR RECHARGING
2nd of 2 Parts
Question: My father died
last fall, and my healthy mother, 75, leans on me for everything, especially social interaction. My husband has been working very hard, and we
badly need a vacation. My mother wants
to come. I hate to say “no,” but.....
Answer: Even though this particular
column is about multi-generation vacations, in this case, I would advise you to
say “No.” You and your husband have a
right to get away by yourselves and recharge your own batteries. Encourage your mother to join a group tour or
elder hostel program.
TIPS to Make a Multi-generation Vacation Fun:
In planning a three
generation vacation, you need to:
1. Decide what kind of climate will give you the
activities you all can enjoy. Hot? Cold? Moderate?
This will help you identify a general geographic area as well as time of
year for this special vacation.
2. Identify
a place that has a combination of activities which address each generation’s
physical capabilities as well as interests.
While your parent may be very active, he or she may still like some
slower paced, less physically challenging fun.
You and your children may look for adventure -- outdoors, physically
challenging.
3. Specify you want adjacent rooms when you make
hotel reservations. Be sure to ask if
there is a discount for booking three or more rooms. Each generation (even the children) should
have a separate room. Don’t double-up
generations! Everyone needs his or her
quiet time.
4. Evaluate available public transportation and
how everyone will get around. In big
cities, public transportation is available at a low cost. In smaller cities, there is little, if any,
public transportation. Driving and
getting around can be a hassle and generally means everyone has to stay
together and participate in the same activities.
In both
Also
the sandwich generationer should have a list of all medicines taken by the
older parents and extra prescriptions in case medicine is lost. Never pack critical medicine in check-on
baggage. Carry them with you in hand
luggage.
Additionally, everyone over 18 should carry a Living Will, which gives another family member the ability to make medical decisions in case of an accident.
Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children, yourself and working at the same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your once vibrant parent is now frail and needy?
Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation is dedicated to the 50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns and/or responsibilities.
* * *
Do
you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered
individually, appropriate letters will be answered in this column whenever
possible. Letters may be edited. Send letters to Ms. Carol Abaya,
mail direct to her at
Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator of the unique magazine The Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.
NOTES TO EDITORS: text = 569 words; other material = 160 words
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